Not trying to wuss out on this, but there’s no way in hell we could come up with only five breakup songs.

And since there are lots of definitive lists out there—like NPR’s All Songs Considered or this one on MixPod or this one from MTV —we’re going to approach it more like a wine list.

After all, some songs pair well with a bitter breakup. Some go nicely with a bit of rage. And others are made to be played when you’re the one who’s happy it’s over.

Here are our top breakup songs for whatever kind of breakup mood you’re in.

• When you need to wallow: Pictures of You – The Cure

• When you’re mad: You Oughta Know – Alanis Morissette

• When you’re being jerked around: Should I Stay or Should I Go – The Clash

• When you’re confused: Karma – Alicia Keys

• When you deserve an apology: Apologize – Timbaland

• When you need to dance it out: Single Ladies (Put a Ring On It) – Beyoncé

• When you need to yell: You Give Love a Bad Name – Bon Jovi

• When you need to laugh: One Week – Barenaked Ladies

• When you need to cry: Nothing Compares 2 U – Sinead O’connor

• When you want to torture yourself: God Only Knows – The Beach Boys

• When you feel like pouting: Soft Shock – Yeah Yeah Yeahs

• When you need to get over it already: I Will Survive – Gloria Gaynor

• When you want to break stuff: Ex-Girlfriend – No Doubt

• After you’ve broken stuff: No More Drama – Mary J. Blige

• When you don’t care any more: Smile – Lily Allen

Now, should you have your beautiful heart smashed into a billion tiny pieces, listen to anything that helps you get through it and never forget this famous quote by Winston Churchill: If you’re going through hell, keep going.

Keep your chin up, Sexy. Someone better is on the way.

We just know it,
Bedsider