Funny. Beautiful. Clinical. Awkward. Naughty. Natural. The v-word—and every slang term associated with it —evokes a lot of different things, but ooh la la, it’s fun to say. Here are some of our favorite terms for your honey pot.

• Close to the Real Word. Vajayjay, Vag/Vadge, Vagine, Gine, or Giney (those last three are pronounced with a long i sound).

• Funny Ha-Ha. Hooha, Hair Pie, Tunnel of Love, Lady Business, The Duchess, Lady V, Jane, Juicebox, Flowerpot, Banana Basket, Whisker Biscuit, Sausage Wallet, and Fur Burger.

• Who Came Up With These!? Cooter, Coochie, Cookie, Muff, Yum Yum, Goodies, Snatch, Box, Na Na, La La, Lady Garden, Snooch, South Mouth, Velvet Curtain, Vertical Smile, Hot Pocket, and Happy Flappy.

• Exotic Names for Foreign Affairs. Italian: Patata, Topa. Spanish: Chocho, Chacha, Chocha, Conchita Mia, Papo, Almeja. Japanese: Asoko, Manko. Russian: Cipka. Hindi: Yoni, Bhosdo. Filipino: Peck Peck. Portugese: Boceta, Cona. Finnish: Pillu. Hawaiian: Punani.

• Animal Names. Beaver, Bearded Clam, Duck, Oyster, Snapper, Kitty, Pussy, Bird, and Monkey.

Now that we’ve mentioned it about 50 times, don’t forget to keep your vag safe, healthy, and happy. And if you’re not ready to get pregnant, make sure it benefits from some really awesome birth control .

Enjoy your Piece of Heaven,
Bedsider